Yes I have a list of people I'd like to Throat Punch...don't you???? It's not like I really would, I really want to, but of course I can't. I can make a list and get a good laugh out of it.
People I want to Throat Punch:
* all the ladies I had to spend the afternoon with a week or so ago. I also now want to burn all my designer bags because of these same women. Wear a LV with and a Target outfit and I couldn't agree more, wear an LV bag with rhinestone cowgirl flip flops and guns a blazing t-shirt and I want to rip the LV bag out of your hand as if I was rescuing it.
* Pookie's principal...please, please, please, stop talking to me...I am not listening. If it's not about Pookie then lets move along, stop holding up car line.
* the umpire at most baseball games.
* the neighbors cat.
* anyone who works at the AT&T, Apple or Best Buy retail stores. I LOVE my Ipad but would rather be throat punched than go to the Apple, AT&T or Best Buy store.
* the mailman, but only when he shoves a package the size of a watermelon in my mailbox because he didn't want to bring it to the door.
* the makers of Game of Thrones! You suck and should be throat punched for making us wait so long in between seasons.
* the woman in our town who wears her name badge EVERY where she goes. I bet she sleeps in it. Actually I shouldn't pick on her, maybe it's a reminder. I've seen her at parties with it on.
*the waitress who ask me if diet Pepsi is ok.
* the next person who tells me how lucky I am to live in the country.
* the lady at the MAC counter when she tells me they are out of Cultured lip gloss.
*the woman in our tiny town who makes voodoo dolls out of hair and drinks chicken blood. No, she doesn't really drink chicken blood.
* the woman who was talking shit about halter horses in front of Pookie and she know that Pookie has two.
* Kim Kardashian
* the person who said I should move to the city if I didn't like country life...WOW I never thought about that!
* the woman who recently tried to explain to me why I should give bar be que a another try. This was very difficult to leave alone. I promise I almost looked at her and asked if she'd give shit another try.
* the maker of Rainbow Loom. Thank you for this heaping pile of mess! Rubber bands everywhere.
* the man at Lowe's who told me to ask my husband if the mailbox post I wanted to order was ok. Throat punch was really not what I wanted to do to him, I really wanted to tell him "I asked my husband and he said I could not only order the post but I could shove it up your ass too." I didn't!!!!!! Take a deep breath...
* Tori Spelling...I actually love her, but OMG four children and look that great.
* the woman who asked me what Lilly Pulitzer was (I should have asked her if she lived in a cave.)
* the driver that almost hit Little Einstein and ruined his bike and then DIDN'T buy him a new bike. THIS person really should be Throat Punched!!!!
* the mom on our baseball team who sold ZERO fundraiser tickets. Thank you for your support.
* tom cruise
* anyone who ask to join my card group - four years, four women...enough said.
* the checker at HEB who ask what I'm going to do with "that" -I did answer her "take it home"
I am being silly, I have never throat punched anyone, obviously I've day dreamed about it.
Who do you want to throat punch???????? don't say me, that's a given.